Let’s be honest. As fun and joyful as the holidays can be, they are also a very busy and sometimes stressful time of year. Expectations are so high that things sometimes don’t go according to plan. And being surrounded by family means there is ample opportunity for embarrassment in front of your nearest and dearest.
Have you ever done anything foolish in front of your loved ones? These women sure have! Below are five funny stories about mishaps and a little mayhem at Christmas time.
Full Moon Rising
Ashley Kay shares this gem of accidentally sharing her assets with the neighborhood:
The neighbors were outside in their front yard looking all motivated so I decided to get motivated as well and I hung our Christmas lights, even though I was freakin’ FREEZING! It took me about 15 minutes or so to finish up and the whole time I just kept thinking that I couldn’t believe how much colder it was outside than the day before. The hubs came home a little while later and I told him that I had put up the lights & that he was super lucky I did it because it was COLD as hell outside! He said to me, “Turn around”…I’m like, Um…what??” I’m thinking, “what the hell, did he not just hear me?”. Again he says, “Turn around!” with a huge grin on his face. Well, long story short, the whole a$$ of my pants was ripped out. So THAT is why I was so cold.
A Convenient Christmas
Jessica Bern of The Mouthy Housewives tells of this bonding family experience:
It was Christmas Eve. All the stockings had been filled except my ex-mother-in-law’s. Her husband had forgotten to buy anything for her. So at 11pm, my husband and I drove all over town trying to find stocking stuffers. Needless to say, there weren’t many places to look. We ended up at a gas station mini-mart and got her travel samples of Tylenol and toothpaste. At a 7-Eleven, we found the last copy of Cosmopolitan and a Santa Claus that said “Merry Christmas” and “Ho, Ho, Ho” when you threw it against a wall. The next day, while emptying her stocking, my mother-in-law was a bit confused. We finally told her what had happened and, well, she and my now-ex father-in-law are still together, although it was touch and go for a few moments.
Walking on Broken Glass
An anonymous reader of Refinery 29 writes of a very cutting Christmas gift:
One Christmas, I somehow managed to get it together and have all my gifts wrapped and ready days in advance. I couldn’t wait to head home to Maine and impress my family with my thoughtfully selected array. I was going to be a hero.
But when my brother came to pick me up, I was, of course, running late. Frazzled, I threw on some clothes, loaded the bags with the gifts into my arms, and started down five flights of stairs. That’s when I tripped, and the presents proceeded down two flights on their own — my heart dropped at the sound of vases breaking. And that was the year I gave my family broken glass for Christmas. But hey, since then no one gives me a hard time about assembling my gifts the night before.
Warning: Falling Tree Zone
The Natural as Possible Mom, Karen Bannan, lives out every perfectionist decorator’s Christmas nightmare:
The tree was up. The house was decorated. And we were out at a hockey game. We came home expecting to see the twinkling lights of our tree shining through the window. We didn’t, though. Where was our tree? We walked inside and our dog was standing there, but our tree wasn’t — standing, that is. He had got caught in the batting, and pulled the entire tree down trying to get untangled. I can laugh about it now. The image is really funny, if you’re not the one who owned the tree! (We actually only lost four ornaments; the dining-room table broke the tree’s fall!)
A Fearsome Feast
Amy Kossoff Smith of the MomTini Lounge takes the salmonella-laced cake with this nauseating tale:
My tip comes from a personal disaster which brought lots of friendly jokes my way, after the fact: Consider the size of your oven, and purchase a turkey large enough to feed your guests, but not so big and gangly, that you can’t cook it thoroughly. A few years back, 12 of my 14 guests got severe food poisoning after my feast. The two who didn’t get sick were vegetarians. Since then, I always buy a small turkey so I know I can cook it right, and supplement it with extra turkey breasts, which have the healthier white meat anyhow. Plus, I received three meat thermometers as hostess gifts the following year.
Do you have any holiday disasters to share? Leave us a comment!